Sunday 21 December 2014

Make your Christmas less Stressful

December is well and truly here, but don't stress. As we come to the end of the year it is a good time to reflect.  How has the year been for you?  What have you enjoyed in the year?  What could you do different next year?  Start thinking about some goals for next year.   What would you like to achieve in 2015?

Christmas is nearly here and it tends to bring a lot of stress to many people.  There are many situations that can be stressful, but really it can come down to perception. 

Keeping up with the Jones is not a great idea around Christmas.  Christmas and the festive holidays are really about enjoying family and friends company and enjoying good times with them.  That can't be measured by money or the size of a present.  A well thought out present doesn't need to cost the earth, and the thought really does count. Christmas isn't a time to put yourself in debt that will carry over to the next year.  All that will do is cause you worry and it becomes short lived happiness. Make a present or buy a group present.

We all enjoy having all the best food and drink around us, but live according to your budget and do a bit of planning before you shop.  Again you can get savvy and have gorgeous meals.  You can make your own decorations for the table, just google some great craft sites. Ask people to bring a plate, most people will be more than happy to.

The season really is about family and friends. Remember to stop and enjoy the moment, don't get so caught up in organising that you miss those awesome memories being made.

If you are on your own around Christmas, see if you can join a group of other people around you. There will be others wanting to get together.

Best Wishes for the Festive Season,
Wishing happiness, fun, laughter and great memories.
Kim and Family

Kim McNamara

Sunday 14 December 2014

Special Needs Children - Angels that walk the Earth

Over the years I have had a fair bit to do with children with special needs and their parents. The sheer love and determination from parents of special needs children, shines though, and parents learn ways to manage different problems they have to overcome.
Years ago as a teenager I used to visit a friends brother in a residential care home for children. My first visit left me feeling sad and overwhelmed. Being a teenager and really thinking mostly about myself, I felt I had enough issues in my own life to deal with, growing up seemed hard enough at the time. So I choose not to go back and visit again. 

Something inside me keep bugging me and months later I returned to the home and my visits become weekly Friday night visits.  My love for these children grew and grew to the point I gave up Happy Hour at work. Remember I was a teenager, happy hour in the middle of town on a Friday night was a ton of fun.  Something inside me gave my night away in order to visit my friends at the home. To me it became a no brainer, get tanked or go and visit some kids that really enjoyed my visit.

Over the time I visited, some of the children passed away. I found that really hard at the age I was at.  I felt lucky that the friend I visited was still with us. I remember we changed our phone number and I rang him up and said “ Can you get a nurse to write down my new phone number” and he said “tell it to me, I will remember it”.  I told it to him, but doubted he would remember it, so I thought never mind, I will write it down on my next visit.
On my next visit I found out that one of the children had passed away, I felt devastated.  One day I went to visit my friend and he wasn’t well and in bed.  I was a bit naive looking back. I got a phone call the following Monday to come in, as my friend was poorly.  I went immediately and when I saw him I was told the news that he only had a few hours to live.  I passed a nurse called Sarah coming out of his room, she was an angel on earth, she walked out crying. I said, “Am I too late ? she said “No, but we are not assisting life anymore, so it wont be long”.

I went into his room, and there he was lying in bed, peacefully. The family was around the bed, the family dog was in the room. I talked to my friend, saying I was there and it was OK to relax. He stared at me for about 15 minutes and then passed away as we all held hands.  I was devastated.
At the funeral the family came and asked me to come and sit up front with them, it was then I began to realise the significance of my visits to him every week. It was also then I was told the story, of how my friend had gone unconscious, then came around and told the family to ring me and tell me to come quickly. His father said, “I don't know how to get hold of Kim, I don't know her number”,  my friend went back into unconsciousness, then he came back too, recited my phone number and told his dad to ring me and to come quickly.  It was then that I realised how significant my visits were, and from there on in, my friend made a massive impact on my life.

From there, I began to become supportive to special needs people and to their families.  Since then I have worked with young and old special needs people. They are a treasure on this earth, they teach us so much, they taught me to be humble and be filled with gratitude for all I have.

After I did my Life Coaching training, I was asked to work with many special needs children, however my passion more was in helping mum and dad. Mum and dad can easily become exhausted and become un-resourceful, so my coaching focus came around resourcing parents to be the best they could be, as I believe parents intuitively know what to do when they have the energy and time to think things through.

To this day, I support parents with special needs children, and I now have four gorgeous children, my second eldest daughters name is Sarah.

Kim McNamara

Tuesday 9 December 2014

The Power of Positive People

Why is it some people can be positive no matter what, and some people can be negative no matter what. What makes us so different? What makes people who can seem like they are in a very similar situation react so differently? It is all about perception

Just because we are a negative person doesnt mean we need to be a negative all of our lives, it means that if we want to change, we need to change our  mind set. 

So what is a mind set? A mind set is the way our mind is set. It is an automatic response. Those who choose to be negative will choose a negative reaction to what ever is around them, likewise those who choose to be positive will have a positive reaction to what is incoming. Some would argue that it isnt a choice to be negative and that I dont understand their situation. All of us have things to deal with in our lives some pleasant and some are not. Our reaction to incoming stress is the key.

Negativity breeds negativity. Normally negative people will surround themselves with negative people, as they are doing life in the same way. If you were a super negative person, being around a super positive person would drive you up the wall. So we tend to stay in the circle of people who do live the same way we do. 

Want a change? then choose to do it differently. By choosing, I mean making a conscious effort to do things differently. It might take some time to be positive or try and find a positive side to things, but it is worth the effort. Many studies have shown that a positive mind set is good for the mind and body. A negative mind set will drive you into the ground, if everything is always doom and gloom, the onset of depression wont be too far away, and why live with such a loss of enjoyment of life.

I believe it is a birth right for people to be happy and positive.  If we live with this thought, then we automatically look for positive things, we are drawn to what we believe.  It is like when we get a new car, we notice how many other people have the same type of car like ours, we are purposely looking out and noticing the same cars, likewise we can purposely notice and look out to see the positive side in things. If you are feeling stuck and have a friend who can put a positive spin on things, ask them there thoughts on a current situation, sometimes a situation can look, feel and seem different if it is framed in a different way, and often another person can point that out to us because we are locked in automatic pilot

Positive attitude breeds happiness, good things will flow on, people will love to be around you, you will be uplifting, you will look and feel great, and in that mind set anything is possible.

Kim McNamara
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